In college, I started going to the gym for the first time as, like, a thing…that people do.
Whereas my high school gym was one of those dank, sweaty weightlifting rooms where guys hung out and spit on the floor (gross), my university had a pretty amazing and quite enormous gym, so it seemed exciting.
I had no idea what I was doing. Honestly, I mostly still don’t. I am someone who definitely relies on the pictographs conveniently glued to each weight machine in order to know what it’s for (“Torture device, torture device…probably another torture device?”).
Having no clue, my friend Kari and I took our guy friends’ advice one day when they instructed us on how to do lunges. With a 25lb weight in each hand.
Suffice it to say, as weightlifting newbs, we were in a WORLD of hurt the next day. I could barely walk down stairs for about a week.
When you weightlift, there’s a certain amount of discomfort to be expected in order to improve.
For those not used to this, that can either lead to thinking some pains are normal when you’ve actually overdone it or (god forbid) injured yourself, or, more often, it leads to taking it too easy and never making gains.
They come in different weights for a reason…so you can keep improving
Recently, I’ve been having rotator cuff problems, and my shoulder is SUPER inflamed. Moving it in certain ways causes massive amounts of pain and also makes it feel stuck, like moving it further will break it.
My physical therapists are having me do all sorts of things that seem counterintuitive. In order to get the pain to stop in the long run, I have to do exercises that cause me discomfort and sometimes pain right now. I have to push through them and fatigue my muscles so that my brain stops guarding them. Once my muscles are fatigued, I start to get some of my flexibility back.
What does this have to do with voiceover?
Well, for the past four years or more, I’ve been in a constant struggle with myself to do my marketing for my voiceover business. I’ve done cold calling, cold emailing, LinkedIn marketing…I’ve taken League of Listbuilders with Jonathan Tilley and Tracy Lindley’s LinkedIn course, had private marketing coaching with Tom Dheere, and have talked to coaches and other voice talent and WoVO mentors about how THEY do their marketing.
And you know what?
It’s STILL uncomfortable.
But much like weightlifting, I know the only thing that’s going to make it less uncomfortable is to either quit (which doesn’t get me to my goals, does it?) or to JUST DO IT (thanks, Nike).
Well, how do you get yourself to do something that is mentally or physically uncomfortable?
I have a few tricks I use from time to time. This time around, I used the bet.
If I lose, I pay you $200. If you lose, I win because I got my work done. Capiche?
Tired of my own stubbornness in avoiding the work that must happen to get work, I bet two of my accountability group teammates each $100 that I would send 100 marketing emails by the following week.
Then, that VERY NIGHT, I was about to go to sleep when at 2am, I heard scratching on my front door, and long story short, I spent the next three days straight sleep deprived and unshowered, taking care of an abandoned and non-housetrained puppy, and trying desperately to find its owners so that I could have time of my own again.
The floof in question
While the dog was here, I spent every sleeping moment asking if I really was asleep (half the time the answer was “no”), and every waking moment doing something dog-related.
When, after three days, the dog went to live with my friend in Minnesota, I spent about a day putting my house and life back together, and then realized I had less than three days left to fulfill the terms of my bet.
Oh, shit.
My options were:
Admit defeat and pay $200
Give up fun for two days and win the bet
I couldn’t believe, though, how many people offered me a third option:
3. Make excuses and back out of my bet
“I’m sure your friends would get it.”
“It’s completely understandable if you don’t finish it, I mean you have a valid reason.”
WHAT? No! Absolutely not!
Bets are a form of accountability, and a commitment I take seriously.
I made this bet to hold myself accountable no matter what happened. To help me commit to doing the thing that I was having trouble committing to.
Now, I’m sure that my accountability group pals would have let me off the hook if I had asked. However, if they did, how seriously would I take any future attempt to hold me accountable?
I need to believe that they will be merciless and cruel, and would force me to sell my own hair Fantine-style in order to pay them if need be.
I dreamed a dream in days gone by…
With commitment, the only options are:
I win the bet, and get my work done.
I lose the bet, and owe money.
There is no option 3 where I back out. That is not commitment.
Backing out is what my acting teacher would have called “dilettante behavior.”
Dilettantes give up. Pros commit and find a way to make it happen.
So, in the two and a half days leading up to my accountability group meeting, I took a look at what was on my schedule and decided what in my life needed to take a back seat to my commitment to this goal.
Work—partially. Any on-my-own-time training stuff got pushed to the weekend. Everything that was scheduled stayed.
The free Quickbooks class I had signed up to take—unfortunately yes
My regular voiceover meetup group (sad panda)
Netflix (duh)
Showering (just temporarily)
Did I make a few sacrifices to get this done? Yeah. Though they weren’t particularly painful ones.
My work stuff still got done by the deadline. I’ll figure out Quickbooks on my own, and I’ll see my voiceover group next week. And guess what—Netflix didn’t go anywhere.
If not for the bet, could I have been flexible with myself?
Sure.
But here’s what I know about tasks like this: When you get one of these tasks done, and you prove to yourself that you can do it, you empower yourself. You realize how strong you actually are, and you increase your mental strength as well.
In fact, the week after I completed my bet, I sent another 100 emails within the first few days of the week! Easy, peasy!
So, my question to you is:
Where in your life or career are you avoiding discomfort?
Those are probably the areas where you will find the most potential for growth.
Commit. Push through. And make some sacrifices.
The gains that come as a result will make it worth your while.